What's more important?

Ever just wanna slap the shit out of someone just so they can grow the hell up? Yeah, that's me right now. Really and truly, I might be annoyed by certain things but it takes a whole lot for me to actually be upset. And me being upset is different from being angry. This isn't about me though, but just thought I'd say so you understand where I coming from.

Parents always think they're right. ALWAYS. So they always feel they need to speak to you a certain way, guilting you into shit or trying to get inside your head to make you feel bad about yourself. Not all parents do it but a lot of them do.

FAST FORWARD

Me and my dad have never had the best relationship. We cannot get along at all. We would try to have a civilized conversation but end up in an argument and somebody gets told to go fuck themselves.The last couple times I did the telling so he's been a bit on edge when it comes to me. Fine, I understand that. Think about these situations though:

Exhibit A: You try to be nice to someone out of the goodness of your heart (and also because you don't want to go to hell for being a cunt) and they just never appreciate it.

Exhibit B: You initiate conversations ALL THE TIME and it's like they never want to speak to you.

Exhibit C: You try to build a relationship and all they do is shut you out.

After all of this, can you understand why I keep saying "Go fuck yourself?" Good. I've always tried to be nice to my dad but I'm guessing he's just not used to good treatment. I don't know what is wrong with him but DON'T screw up your own kids just because maybe you weren't loved as a child. If something is wrong, simply communicate the problem. Can I read your fucking mind? Talented as I am, I really cant.

People think that material things can make up for fucked up emotions but really and truly, what do you do when you just can't buy love anymore? Yes, that's right...YOU BITCH AND PISS PEOPLE OFF. However, gone are the days when I used to care. I realized that if I sat here and wallowed in my annoyance/upset/anger then it would just give me wrinkles. So I laugh. Everyday. Laugh at the fact that I'm pretty fucked up. Laugh at the fact that he's fucked up. I'll never really know what's eating him, nor do I care but I'd just like it very much if he would just let life take it's course. We'll never be perfect but now when I look back at it, I wouldn't want us to be.

Us being fucked up, (well him for the most part) has helped me to become the person that I am today, which is why I cant understand how people don't have any definition in their life. I'm not sure what I mean by definition but it's in my head and maybe you'll figure it out eventually. The thing I want to leave with is that money cant buy happiness and don't let material things determine important relationships in your life. A healthy relationship is far more important than anything you can buy. Grow up.